Sunday, August 30, 2009

Super Shlorp

INT. CLARK KENT'S LIVING ROOM - DAY

Superman, in Clark's clothes, sits in the living room. Beat.

SUPERMAN (V.O.)
I wonder if I could suck my own dick. I am Superman after all.

Beat.

SUPERMAN (V.O.)
I probably can.

Beat. Superman lies down to take a nap.

OMG PERFECT SKIT

It Describes How You're Feeling All the Time

EXT. GOTHAM ROOFTOPS - NIGHT

Batman and Robin watch as the Joker escapes on his helicopter. Beat.

BATMAN
I can't fucking do anything right.

THE END

Friday, August 21, 2009

I Could Write for TV Guide

Next Season on 'Curb Your Enthusiasm'... A series of highly neurotic set of incidents will cause Larry David to pursue petty arguments with hilarious consequences. The season will have heavy influences from both the Yiddish theatre and vaudeville. Someone will swear.

Next Season on '30 Rock'... Liz Lemon will most likely have an unusally high amount of trouble running a show apparently called 'TGS'. An African American named Tracy Jordan may or may not do something silly while a rich guy will call the shots. I hope Steve Martin will guest star.

Next season on 'Mad Men'... A very handsome man will sexually intimidate some advertisements into doing something amazing as British People look on and Alex writes his boner blog.

Next Season on 'The Office'... Michael Scott will find himself in a plethora of awkward situation as paper is being sold and produced. Dwight leaves the office in order to enslave the aboriginy Tarahumara tribe of Mexico and use them as slaves around the beet farm. That is, if he can catch them!

Monday, August 17, 2009

George and Martha's Nostrils: Nipples?

VSYou tell me.
Oh yeah, NSFW.